If you met our little boy, you would never know that he wasn't ours. He looks like us and he fits in so very well with us. He is friendly, outgoing and well mannered (we are working on saying "Please" and "Thank you"). But I know his past, where he has been, and because of my work, I know the effect that those things can have on a person. So my mind is constantly thinking about how to best meet his needs. Sure, he seems like a "normal" child who wants you to stay with him until he falls asleep at night, but is there more to it? Should I be more responsive when he calls out for me while my husband is putting him down? Or should I view this as just another attempt to avoid bedtime, like every other three year old on the planet?
I see clients everyday who needed just a little more as a child-a little more attention, a little more responsiveness, a little more validation...and they didn't get it, which is why they are in my office. I don't want that to be my child one day. But I also don't want him to get the message that he is broken. I want him to be independent, capable and confident. And no amount of training in the world can tell me exactly how to balance those two!
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